How to find self-worth and why it's important to your wellbeing
Self-worth is a concept that we might not think about too often, but it is one that impacts us on a daily basis, and it can be found in almost everything we do. How we treat ourselves, how we treat others, and how we go about our daily lives says a lot about how we feel on the inside.
For the most part, we have learned that our worth is tied to external factors, and this can make it quite hard to feel good about ourselves (especially when we aren't meeting the expectations that these factors demand). Thankfully, our self-worth is actually not dependent on these factors at all, and it is rather something that stays constant. To understand this, let's start by looking at what we might have learned to tie our self-worth to:
What we commonly tie self-worth to:
◦ Our weight
◦ How productive we are
◦ Our performance
◦ Our job/career
◦ How much money we make
◦ What other people think of us
◦ Our relationship status
◦ How many friends we have
◦ Our social media following
◦ The things we own
And the list can go on! Now you might be wondering: if our worth isn't connected to any of these things, where does it come from? That's the good news! Just by being, we are worthy. We are worthy of love, we are worthy of empathy, we are worthy of understanding, we are worthy of belonging, and we are worthy of feeling good. Brené Brown summarizes this very well when she states, "When you get to a place where understand that love and belonging, your worthiness, is a birthright and not something you have to earn, anything is possible".
Now that we know that we are worthy of all of these good things, how can we start living this self-worth? I believe that it starts with a mindset shift.
Instead of saying: "I am lazy because I wasn't productive today" or "I am not at my ideal weight so I am not worthy of love", we can re-frame the situation to put our worth at the center of our thoughts. We can say, "I wasn't productive today- but that doesn't take away from my worth". Or, "I am not at my ideal weight, but I am still worthy of love because my weight does not define me". By simply noticing, and then re-framing our thoughts, we can change start to change our lives.
It may take some time, but just knowing that your self-worth is not dependent on all of these external factors can vastly improve your life, your wellbeing, and your health. Knowing that you are worthy can help you see the importance of taking care of yourself, and it can allow you to be gentle and kind with yourself when you fall back into old patterns.
A health journey is exactly that: a journey. It's not about a temporary quick fix, but it is rather about knowing that you are worthy of good health, and so many other beautiful things, and honoring that.